As a person afflicted with a mental-health related concern, staying fit should be paramount to my daily concerns, most especially that I am not growing any younger and my metabolism is slowly regressing (I will be turning 34 this year, and people in their 30s have a hard time keeping up with the necessities accorded to one’s body clock). Since fitness is one that should not be left to the sideways, it is definitely that important that a person should find the motivation to undertake a routine, coupling it with a vow that this routine be kept. In short, discipline is indeed imperative, for without it a person who constantly wishes to have either a superbod or a six-pack could find themselves bawling instead of complimenting themselves of a good job in the quest towards healthy living.
Now where do I figure in all these? For quite some time now, I have been totally remiss with anything that has got to do with staying healthy. Time and again, my diet would consist of processed canned goods, heavy meals (though not necessarily fat-laden), bags of chips, occasional soda, ice cream, heaping servings of rice, chocolate bars, french fries, burgers… you name it. Not that I am mostly comfortable eating those but because of every-now-and-then bouts of comfort eating brought forth by no other than my depressive longings. Oh yes, I do comfort eating; and each and every moment I indulge I do feel a certain ache in my heart for purposefully letting myself be carried away in a manner of cavorting with the daemons of gluttony—and this is notwithstanding my tendencies for scrupulosity at times. It is with this that I end up avowing to never touch hefty amounts of food, only to break such promises whenever opportunity finds it fortuitous. Eventually I found that this seemingly never-ending cycle of such lack of self-control with immediate responses of guilt and shame proved sans any beneficence for myself, as the more I incline myself to the comforts of a Bacchanalian predilection towards food and drink, the more I fall into the pits of despair and depression. Why would it not be so? As they say, we are what we eat; and when we fill ourselves with that which poisons us (let us face the fact that too much processed food can be harmful than rewarding), our mind reacts with the same malevolence as though our soul had been corrupted with the most aberrant sin known to man. Thus, there is no hint of goodness, as the stomach merely processes that which should stream through our blood vessels, bringing those juices of either health or decrepitude in all our crevices, the mind included.
So much for what I know and what I practice! Such irony that I know many of the less arcane stuff about human biological mechanisms but never with the necessary praxis. However, I have always believed that I could see the dawning of a new era (if I should thus be so grand about it), for change is the only constant thing in this world—then again, as they say. If this should so be the case, then it is not too late for me to mumble my vows anew that I, once more, be the disciple of Health and renounce the viciousness of decadence.
Since these days still form part of my yearly vacation from work (ah, the perks of teaching), I will have these remaining early morning hours as my jogging time, where I could feel the breeze rush through my body to refresh and relax me. This will go for an hour or two, only that I ought to make sure that I wake up at 4 AM to bathe before proceeding. After two hours I will have my breakfast of fruit and health shake, no rice, but only a few servings of bread for energy. Thereafter, I will have to refrain from snacking or taking in anything except water until lunchtime where I would have to eat 1/2 cup of rice and any available viand. Once more, no snacking until 6PM, whereby by that time I shall be taking in another 1/2 cup of rice with any available viand and fruit. No more meals would then follow. I should say, this plan might be that ambitious given my current situation; but what can I do? I need to lose weight before opening of classes so as I could work without much physical strain on my part for, as of date, I am that obese and I now have difficulty walking, and that I have to literally drag myself up a flight of stairs. It is not pretty.
This would be a big problem for me, actually. Yes, I have all those plans hatched out, yet the dilemma is how I would execute those. I would start my routine religiously for one to three days straight then I lose momentum, perhaps because I easily shed off motivation to do anything. Again, it might be the depression at work and as such, it could definitely be that nasty. Nevertheless, there should be persistence and patience—those two things that I find difficult to maintain or even invoke—in order to guide me to do my work right. Motivation cannot make its foothold in someone who possess flimsy perceptions about what they do, much more if one does not condition the mind to seek for resolutions through working hard for those. Patience and persistence, therefore, are keys to success at this point with prayer at the helm of course.
It is hard for us to wait for results about almost everything. We wait and wait, sometimes to the point of futility for some in as much as people are fond of seeking mostly instantaneous proofs of their labour. However, it must be understood perhaps that it is the little things that matter: the process, the effort, the participation in order to behold that which we would like to achieve. Achieving a healthy lifestyle also spells the same thing as fulfillment comes not in what can be beheld after every routine has been met but what had been done in order to achieve that which has been aspired for. Yes, little steps and one can get there through constant trying, praying, and envisioning.
After all has been said and done, I think I ought to ready myself to value even the most miniscule aspects of what I do in relation to my health. I can do this and there is no turning back.
(By the way, I shall be posting updates on my health regimen as soon as everything has been set in stone. I hope all of you could join me in this journey.)